TRUE TALK: Choose to love
My wife and I were filming a wedding recently and the pastor was reciting the usual 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails….”
But instead of just reciting and giving the age-old message surrounding how we should love our spouses in the way it is described in those verses, he gave a little back story and ended up giving a message that has stuck with my wife and I.
The pastor described how the first people who heard the message of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 were people who were fighting with each other, having trouble getting along, and struggling to find a way to live together as a group of people. And while ministering to these people Paul said to them “the best way to live is to live in love”. The pastor went on to tell them that “love is not an emotion that we feel, love is a choice that we make.” We have to choose every day, especially on the hard days, to love each other.
This message got me thinking of how my wife and I show our love to each other. One of the ways that stood out is how we invest our time into each other’s hobbies. I love golf. I play a few times a week and I love to watch the tournaments every week. And while my wife on her own doesn’t have a care in the world about the sport of golf, she will watch the tournaments, converse with me about my favorite golfers, and when possible attend tournaments with me.
My wife on the other hand loves baseball. So in turn I will find myself watching the Braves games most nights and listening to her talk about stats on players I don’t personally have an interest in. And as a getaway I will get her tickets to see the GreenJackets games whenever she has a free night to go.
While these things might seem small and minimal, they make a big impact.
Matthew 6:21 says “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
Where your heart is, you will spend most of your time. I spend a lot of time when I’m not working investing in golf. So instead of just ignoring it or demanding I stop doing something that brings me happiness, my wife decided that she would become a part of something that means a lot to me. And in turn I do the same for her. Instead of turning the game off and demanding she talk to me, I invest in the game with her and then find time to talk after.
Marriage is hard, it requires sacrifice and communication. It also requires intention. So while we don’t always get things right and never will, we should always strive to make the choice to love in our every day. Not just in our marriages, but in every relationship we have.
CHUKA KEN MINISTRY 